Shad_darkz

New day,new experience,but still the same things to be done?

Sometimes,i feel afraid.Afraid of what?Afraid of being alone in this world,afraid of my sins,afraid of my future.

But what can i do to sway away this afraid?Coz thinking about that wouldn’t do anything.

So i just give it up to God,not bcoz i don’t want to care about that,but bcoz i know that only Him could help me to face everything…

For today poem :

                                                    Confession

    I’m kneeing
    With my head bow down
    My hand shakeing
    My heart beating fast

        I know,God
        I know that I’m guilty
        I have done many wrong things
        But i couldn’t stop doing them

            Now i come
            Humbly in Your presence
            Begging for forgiveness
            Hoping for being cleansed from my sins

        I’m afraid
        Too many sins i have done
        Can i still got Your grace
        Can i be freed from all of my sins
   
    But You come
    Standing with Your greatfullness
    Shining in Your Holy throne
    And open Your hands for me

            You said :
            "I’m here,my son
            I forgive you
            Coz you’re my precious son
            No one else like you"

        I’m touched
        My mouth couldn’t say anything
        My tears just flowing like a river
        But my heart feel warmth,joy
   
Thank God
Eventhough You know i could fall again
Eventhough I may betray You again
Eventhough I’m always disappointed You

     But You still here
     Ready to heal me
     Ready to hug me
     Ready to forgive me
     I’m really thankful,God…

Yo.
Days pass by again,leaving both bad n good things in the past,keeps going on as if water flowing from the high places to low places,so it can be stopped or reversed

When u know there’s ending in our moment,will u be ready to face the new next moment?
Or will u be ready to let go this moment?
Remember this moment,treasure it,whether bad or good,coz maybe it won’t come again
Prepare for next moment,bcoz it is the way to living on in this world

For today poem ^^

Human’s way

    I looked at human beings
    They looked interesting
    Living flesh that combined with
    Soul and mind in the inside

        Some people fake their smile
        Bcoz they want others
        Sees them as happy person
        So that they will like them

Some people fake their tears
Bcoz they want others
Sees them with empathy feelings
So that they will be cared

                It looks like contradiction
                But it still the same
                They just wanted
                To be seen by others

        Bcoz human so easily
        Judge people from their looks
        Like people based on impression
        Hate people bcoz bad attitude

    That’s human beings
    They made their own world
    Making subjective standard
    But don’t want treated unfair

                    Judging
                    Believing
                    Denying
                    Accepting
                    Till when this will be continued?

Today,is it just my feeling or is it true that i felt today just so long to pass,not like other days,i just feel as if my time was more than it supposed to be,hahaha
Well,maybe coz i have a lot of activities to do today?Such as wake up in the morning at 6 am bcoz the AC was leaked out and the water just drop exactly in my foot,oh no,so cold in the morning,hahahaha
Then gone to bath,brrr it’s cold and then go to campus to help n introduce with new students.Then me n friends gone to eat in bakmi Cynthia.Then i go to my friend’s boarding house,reading comics n sleep for 1 hour maybe?
After then,we go to Emporium Syadan to DotA together with the new students,and my team got 2 winning and 1 lose,hahaha,it was fun
Then in the night,i help my friend’s sister to get something,and at last buy ketoprak n paying my net fee,hahaha
That’s it , looks like many activities for today
So if u want ur days feel long to past,just do many things,don’t alone,but together with others ^^

For today poem ^^ :

                    Seed               

           One small seed
            Taken by a bird
            And then it was dropped
            In the side of the road

     No one cared
     No one sees
     That the seed was there
     Lying alone without friends

                    Till one day
                   The seed was gone
                   But there was a bud
                    The seed struggling to be a bud

          The bud must face it
          The burning sunlight in the noon
          The cold air in the night
          And the insects tried to eat it

                        I look upon the bud
                        Now it become flower
                        Not a beautiful one
                        Just a simple flower            

The flower just grew up
Then suddenly someone came
He stepping the flower
And then pull it from the ground
Throwing it into the river

                Now the flower had gone
                Leaving nothing
                But the memory of its struggle
                Never gone from my dream                            

When we gone to sleep,all of us surely want to have nice sleep n nice dreams,aren’t we :D?

Dreams are said as flowers in our sleep,sometimes like a rose,beautiful yet dangerous if we touch the thorn.Sometimes like a bud,not yet become flower,made us disappointed
But dreams just dreams,aren’t they ??
Just like a wind,easily goes up n come again…
So don’t always day dreaming,hahahaha ^^

Enjoy today  poem :

                My Dream For Reality   

Yesterday i had a dream
The dream that always wanted by us
Dreaming that our life was perfect
Everything always goes as our wishs

          I dreamt that my life was perfect
         Have nice,caring n wonderful friends
         Always got things that i wanted
         And got someone that being my soulmate

    I felt so happy
    Coz nothing better than this
    I can get what i want
    Everyone cares about me

                 And then suddenly i woke up
                 In the middle of the night
                  Sitting in the bed
                 Thinking about the dream
                 "So that’s only dream eh?"

          And then i thought
           Did my life was better in the dream?
           Or it was better in this reality?
           Then i slept again

    The next day
     I think about the dream again
     Now i got the answer
     It was better in this reality

                 Why?
                 Bcoz if my life just like the dream
                     How boring it was
                 Nothing challenge me
                    And i will be naive

           And i wouldn’t be as strong as now
           Facing the difficulties in my life
            Enjoying things i got with my hard effort
            And be the one that made my life wonderful
             Not based on my surroundings,but by myself

Note : * Feel free to give comments,as usual,i appreciate it

1 month already past,new month already here.
Days pass by so quickly   >.<  , never let me taste it much longer,and now already facing new "today".
What will i taste for "today"?

For today poem :

                                                                The Reason                                    

I looked at u from far away
U seems alot like me
Resembled me in the past
Trying to be strong in ur fragile heart

               In the next day,i came to u
               But u denied me at that moment
               It’s okay for me
              Coz i understand the reason u became so secure

     People always tried to be ur friend
     But they couldn’t
     Coz ur attitude towards them
     Made them hurt

                    I understand that so much
                    So even u hurt me
                    I really know that
                    U endured much pain more than
                         The pain i felt from ur denial

              Today,i come again for u
              Seems u already accept me
              But there still a gap between us
              That will slowly melt as time goes

    Tomorrow,i will come again for u
    And we could be able to walk together
    Smiling n cried together
    Sharing our feelings to each other
    Bcoz now u with me….

NB : if u want to give comment,i will accept it